Cayden was really excited for college football yesterday.
Or was he just squeezing out a poop?
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Whoooooa, Whoooooa, Whoooooa, LET'S GO STATE!!!
Cayden was really excited for college football yesterday.
Or was he just squeezing out a poop?
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Oh how I love my bed
I slept in bed last night for the first time since my birthday (almost a month), and it was WONDERFUL. Both Cayden and I slept as best as we have since we came home, save for our stuffy noses.
He did two hours in his snuggle nest in the pack'n'play (moved from the living room into the bedroom), then the rest of the night next to me in bed.
I think co-sleeping may be the way to go for us, at least until Cayden can soothe himself and eats less frequently at night.
We've done it more than a few times on the couch, and the bed is simply more safe and more comfortable for us to share our snooze.
Only complicating factor is that Dad is in the bed. Brian did wake up a couple of times last night, but I don't think we kept him up all that long. No crying or fussing at all last night, since Chicken Wing nursed himself to sleep each time he woke up. And since I didn't have to get up to feed him (we both stayed horizontal in bed), I got to doze while Cayden ate. And his double-stuffed Bum Genius kept him comfortable from midnight until 7 a.m.
LC Mary said sleep studies have shown that co-sleeping can actually give nursing moms the most rewarding sleep possible, since biorhythms of mom and baby get in sync and they fall in and out of REM sleep together. That, and there's no walking around the house for an hour after nursing, to get baby to fall back asleep.
Think about it: when I nurse him upright at night or when he gets a bottle, he has to be rousted from where he rests and the feeding takes anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes. Say it takes another hour to get him back to sleep (not uncommon), and we're already an hour-and-a-half from the start time of the feed. At least once overnight he goes two hours or less between feedings, so that means I'm back at square one. I got not sleep in between, but he's ready to start the cycle again.
With co-sleeping, not only do I get to snuggle with the little bugger almost all night, but we both drift in and out while he eats, and he's never disturbed so much that he needs to be soothed back to drowsiness.
Yes, there are risks associated with co-sleeping, but my little bit of research so far has shown that the horror stories typically accompany situations where simple precautions and/or common sense were ignored. And I plan to talk about co-sleeping more with Mary on Tuesday and check out a book on the topic from Hershey Med's library. Seems the practice is making something of a come-back in the U.S., probably because breast-feeding is also on the up-tick.
He did two hours in his snuggle nest in the pack'n'play (moved from the living room into the bedroom), then the rest of the night next to me in bed.
I think co-sleeping may be the way to go for us, at least until Cayden can soothe himself and eats less frequently at night.
We've done it more than a few times on the couch, and the bed is simply more safe and more comfortable for us to share our snooze.
Only complicating factor is that Dad is in the bed. Brian did wake up a couple of times last night, but I don't think we kept him up all that long. No crying or fussing at all last night, since Chicken Wing nursed himself to sleep each time he woke up. And since I didn't have to get up to feed him (we both stayed horizontal in bed), I got to doze while Cayden ate. And his double-stuffed Bum Genius kept him comfortable from midnight until 7 a.m.
LC Mary said sleep studies have shown that co-sleeping can actually give nursing moms the most rewarding sleep possible, since biorhythms of mom and baby get in sync and they fall in and out of REM sleep together. That, and there's no walking around the house for an hour after nursing, to get baby to fall back asleep.
Think about it: when I nurse him upright at night or when he gets a bottle, he has to be rousted from where he rests and the feeding takes anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes. Say it takes another hour to get him back to sleep (not uncommon), and we're already an hour-and-a-half from the start time of the feed. At least once overnight he goes two hours or less between feedings, so that means I'm back at square one. I got not sleep in between, but he's ready to start the cycle again.
With co-sleeping, not only do I get to snuggle with the little bugger almost all night, but we both drift in and out while he eats, and he's never disturbed so much that he needs to be soothed back to drowsiness.
Yes, there are risks associated with co-sleeping, but my little bit of research so far has shown that the horror stories typically accompany situations where simple precautions and/or common sense were ignored. And I plan to talk about co-sleeping more with Mary on Tuesday and check out a book on the topic from Hershey Med's library. Seems the practice is making something of a come-back in the U.S., probably because breast-feeding is also on the up-tick.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Packin' stuff up
I can't believe it, but this is the pile of stuff I assembled today, after going through Cayden's things to pull out everything that no longer fits the six-week-old. Some of this stuff (all rated for babies up to 3 months old) he never wore a single time. 
And after the prefold diaper covers started leaking earlier this week, I looked at the tag to find they're recommended for babies 6 to 10 pounds. That discovery, combined with the fact that the back corners of the prefolds don't meet up anymore with the front corners on Cayden, means we're officially done with prefolds. But the diapers themselves can still be used as Bum Genius stuffers and burp clothes.
And since our remaining 'sposies from the first couple of weeks are only rated for babies up to 14 pounds, we're going to use them up over the next few days.
Kudos to Colleen for thinking ahead and getting Pampers Size 2 sposies for the diaper cake. They're good for 12- 18 pounders, so they'll be perfect for our two-week trip to Canada, for which we leave at the end of the month. I didn't want to have to worry about our washing routine on vacation and with washer/drier with which I'm not all that familiar.
Off to Carter's today, to spend some free money (gift certificates) on more long-sleeve shirts in the 6-month range.
And after the prefold diaper covers started leaking earlier this week, I looked at the tag to find they're recommended for babies 6 to 10 pounds. That discovery, combined with the fact that the back corners of the prefolds don't meet up anymore with the front corners on Cayden, means we're officially done with prefolds. But the diapers themselves can still be used as Bum Genius stuffers and burp clothes.
And since our remaining 'sposies from the first couple of weeks are only rated for babies up to 14 pounds, we're going to use them up over the next few days.
Kudos to Colleen for thinking ahead and getting Pampers Size 2 sposies for the diaper cake. They're good for 12- 18 pounders, so they'll be perfect for our two-week trip to Canada, for which we leave at the end of the month. I didn't want to have to worry about our washing routine on vacation and with washer/drier with which I'm not all that familiar.
Off to Carter's today, to spend some free money (gift certificates) on more long-sleeve shirts in the 6-month range.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Really, we're all OK
Sorry to alarm loved ones with the post from a couple of days ago.
Really, we're all OK. Yesterday and today were good days, and even though I was up a lot last night, it was an alright night, too.
Brian and I are still happily married, the baby is in no danger and I promise I'm not going to crack completely.
Writing is just my way of working things out in my head; my own self-help therapy. And it really made me feel good to get that out there. And judging by the comments and personal messages I've received, it made a handful of other women feel good too, knowing none of us is alone on this hormonal, sleep-deprived roller-coaster, the downswings of which I'm calling "the baby crazies."
I promise -- my head is still screwed on tight and I love my husband and son more than I could imagine. But the baby crazies made my mind go places I didn't want it to nor knew it could. But the really bad times have only added up to two or three breakdowns out of the past six weeks. Pretty good ratio, I think, and the desperately sad parts are just as much the reality of the situation as the good days. And the good days are evidenced by all the photos, videos and more upbeat posts, which far outnumber the negative ones.
Day by day and week by week we'll all learn better how to cope with our new life together, and hopefully in a couple of years I will have developed the fourth trimester amnesia I think all moms who have done this more than once or a while ago must have developed over time.
Really, we're all OK. Yesterday and today were good days, and even though I was up a lot last night, it was an alright night, too.
Brian and I are still happily married, the baby is in no danger and I promise I'm not going to crack completely.
Writing is just my way of working things out in my head; my own self-help therapy. And it really made me feel good to get that out there. And judging by the comments and personal messages I've received, it made a handful of other women feel good too, knowing none of us is alone on this hormonal, sleep-deprived roller-coaster, the downswings of which I'm calling "the baby crazies."
I promise -- my head is still screwed on tight and I love my husband and son more than I could imagine. But the baby crazies made my mind go places I didn't want it to nor knew it could. But the really bad times have only added up to two or three breakdowns out of the past six weeks. Pretty good ratio, I think, and the desperately sad parts are just as much the reality of the situation as the good days. And the good days are evidenced by all the photos, videos and more upbeat posts, which far outnumber the negative ones.
Day by day and week by week we'll all learn better how to cope with our new life together, and hopefully in a couple of years I will have developed the fourth trimester amnesia I think all moms who have done this more than once or a while ago must have developed over time.
Breastfeeding and the F-Word
Now I understand why the wealthy Europeans of yester-year had peasant women nurse their babies for them (hence, “wetnurse”). It’s soooo much work, stress, pressure and planning. And it’s so isolating, since no one else – not Dad, not Grandma, not babysitters, not anyone – can make the milk that we want to get into that little system.
And considering we’ve had about as EASY a time with breastfeeding as possible, I can’t imagine what I’d do if we faced any of the challenges so many other women confront and conquer. Latch problems, nipple shields, supplementary breastfeeding systems, acid reflux, allergies, nipple blisters, clogged ducts, mastitis, low milk production, exclusive pumping – you name the breastfeeding challenge, and I’ve talked to or heard from someone who’s experienced it, overcome it and remained dedicated to breastfeeding.
So knowing how “easy” we’ve had it (please, I use the term loosely), I can’t help but feel guilty that we discussed the “F-word” last night. Formula.
My production is impressive (I can feed Cayden plentifully and still freeze or store 12 – 16 ounces each day by pumping just three times), his latch is perfect (unless and until he’s voracious, when he starts growling and thrashing his head all around the boob) and his gas issues are no worse than normal. So how dare I – so blessed in the breastfeeding experience – consider giving up, giving in or taking the easy way out by introducing formula, even just once a day.
But that’s what Brian and I talked about last night.
Formula takes longer to digest, so the curds stay in baby’s stomach longer. Therefore, it’s possible that formula will keep him full, longer. But it’s also possible it won’t, and this growing baby will still wake me up three times a night to eat. Obviously the lactation consultant advises against using formula for a whole host of reasons (especially since we have about 30 four-ounce bags of milk in the freezer), and even the pediatrician’s nurse advised only mixing a fraction of formula into breastmilk, if we decide to accept failure.
Because that’s what it feels like to me. Everything is going as right as possible for us, and the trials and tribulations we’re experiencing are all NORMAL at this stage in the game. I have to keep reminding myself we’re only six weeks in. So today I’m back to my dedication to avoiding formula. Because we don’t need it, because it costs money, because it’s not quite as good as the natural stuff, because one bit of formula a day could start a slippery slope and because one dose – even just one little dose – would mean my baby would not have been fed exclusively by breastmilk.
And I don’t know why, but that’s important to me. Maybe it’s my competitive nature or my strong, sometimes extreme, desire to be the first, the best, the most perfect.
But that’s what stuck with me even yesterday and last night, when I was at my wit’s end – the fact that one bit of formula (tainted milk?) in my baby’s tummy means I didn’t sacrifice and do the best I possibly could for him.
Brian compared the milk situation to the epidural decision: I wanted to avoid the epidural if at all possible, but once I decided to have it, I enjoyed the experience of labor and delivery. Brian thinks here, too, if formula keeps Cayden asleep for longer periods at night, then maybe I’ll be able to get more sleep and stress less about feeding this little bugger.
But something feels fundamentally different about this decision to me. My body can do this for my baby, so it’s just a matter of getting my mind on board during the tough parts. Motherhood is all about sacrifice and selflessness, right? How about a big fat lesson in both in this experience.
So for now, we’re just going to try increasing the amount of breastmilk Cayden takes in his bottle at night, and Chicken Wing will stay exclusively breast-fed for the time-being.
But talk to me again in a month and a half. If we’re still confronting the same feeding schedule and pressures as I prepare to go back to work, we may revisit discussion of the F-word. Or maybe we will before that, who knows.
All I know for sure is that today he’s getting no formula. And I’m pretty sure he’ll have none tomorrow, either. One day at a time.
And considering we’ve had about as EASY a time with breastfeeding as possible, I can’t imagine what I’d do if we faced any of the challenges so many other women confront and conquer. Latch problems, nipple shields, supplementary breastfeeding systems, acid reflux, allergies, nipple blisters, clogged ducts, mastitis, low milk production, exclusive pumping – you name the breastfeeding challenge, and I’ve talked to or heard from someone who’s experienced it, overcome it and remained dedicated to breastfeeding.
So knowing how “easy” we’ve had it (please, I use the term loosely), I can’t help but feel guilty that we discussed the “F-word” last night. Formula.
My production is impressive (I can feed Cayden plentifully and still freeze or store 12 – 16 ounces each day by pumping just three times), his latch is perfect (unless and until he’s voracious, when he starts growling and thrashing his head all around the boob) and his gas issues are no worse than normal. So how dare I – so blessed in the breastfeeding experience – consider giving up, giving in or taking the easy way out by introducing formula, even just once a day.
But that’s what Brian and I talked about last night.
Formula takes longer to digest, so the curds stay in baby’s stomach longer. Therefore, it’s possible that formula will keep him full, longer. But it’s also possible it won’t, and this growing baby will still wake me up three times a night to eat. Obviously the lactation consultant advises against using formula for a whole host of reasons (especially since we have about 30 four-ounce bags of milk in the freezer), and even the pediatrician’s nurse advised only mixing a fraction of formula into breastmilk, if we decide to accept failure.
Because that’s what it feels like to me. Everything is going as right as possible for us, and the trials and tribulations we’re experiencing are all NORMAL at this stage in the game. I have to keep reminding myself we’re only six weeks in. So today I’m back to my dedication to avoiding formula. Because we don’t need it, because it costs money, because it’s not quite as good as the natural stuff, because one bit of formula a day could start a slippery slope and because one dose – even just one little dose – would mean my baby would not have been fed exclusively by breastmilk.
And I don’t know why, but that’s important to me. Maybe it’s my competitive nature or my strong, sometimes extreme, desire to be the first, the best, the most perfect.
But that’s what stuck with me even yesterday and last night, when I was at my wit’s end – the fact that one bit of formula (tainted milk?) in my baby’s tummy means I didn’t sacrifice and do the best I possibly could for him.
Brian compared the milk situation to the epidural decision: I wanted to avoid the epidural if at all possible, but once I decided to have it, I enjoyed the experience of labor and delivery. Brian thinks here, too, if formula keeps Cayden asleep for longer periods at night, then maybe I’ll be able to get more sleep and stress less about feeding this little bugger.
But something feels fundamentally different about this decision to me. My body can do this for my baby, so it’s just a matter of getting my mind on board during the tough parts. Motherhood is all about sacrifice and selflessness, right? How about a big fat lesson in both in this experience.
So for now, we’re just going to try increasing the amount of breastmilk Cayden takes in his bottle at night, and Chicken Wing will stay exclusively breast-fed for the time-being.
But talk to me again in a month and a half. If we’re still confronting the same feeding schedule and pressures as I prepare to go back to work, we may revisit discussion of the F-word. Or maybe we will before that, who knows.
All I know for sure is that today he’s getting no formula. And I’m pretty sure he’ll have none tomorrow, either. One day at a time.
Baby's first cold and Mama's sacroiliac pain
Last week I got a cold, and just as I was afraid, I passed it on to Cayden. I just knew that no matter how much hand washing and sanitizing I did (and I did a TON), there was probably no avoiding it. So he has the sniffles. My cold moved from my throat to my nose and now to my chest, so let's hope it stops in Chicken Wing's nose.
Last night I wanted so badly to make him blow his nose so he could breathe easier, but alas -- you can't make a baby do that. But Mary advised today that we can make him sneeze by tickling under his nose, and sometimes that works to get the snot out. That, and a humidifier. Beyond that, though, we have to let the cold run its course and rely on the fact that all the great antibodies he's getting from my breastmilk will take care of things on their own.
And I learned two things when I went to the doc this morning.
First, (drumroll and fanfare, please...) at six weeks post-partum, I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight!! Yay!! My midsection doesn't quite look the same as it did last September -- I don't know that my navel piercing will ever look like it did, I still have a stripe down my belly and things just look a little "softer" now -- but in today's group I learned some neat tummy excercises using baby as added resistance!
And secondly (and the reason I went to the doc), the pain I thought was in my right hip or lower back since somewhere in the third trimester of pregnancy was diagnosed as sacroiliac joint inflammation or injury. Apparently the pelvis has some joints in it, and the natural joint expansion of pregnancy irritated one of them for me. Continually lifting Cayden and twisting and bending with him has aggravated the joint, causing the resurgence of pain.
My body is still in the process of physically and hormonally returning to its pre-pregnancy ways, so the condition will likely fix itself in a matter of weeks or months. However, the pain got pretty bad earlier this week, and it will likely only get worse considering I can't really avoid lifting Cayden and this boy is still gaining about 2 ounces a day. So Dr. Saacks reccommended physical therapy and ultrasound treatment for me in lieu of the drugs I can't take while breastfeeding. Waiting for a call from the referral scheduler.
And thanks for all the good wishes and words of encouragement earlier this week. Mimi took Chicken Wing for much of yesterday to let me get some sleep and get caught up, and today has been a good day, so far. Just another one of those ups and downs that I keep hearing will continue for at least another month or so. I'm OK (even chipper and positive!) most of the time, but exhaustion and hormones have pushed me to the limit two or three times so far. Early Wednesday morning was one of them.
Last night I wanted so badly to make him blow his nose so he could breathe easier, but alas -- you can't make a baby do that. But Mary advised today that we can make him sneeze by tickling under his nose, and sometimes that works to get the snot out. That, and a humidifier. Beyond that, though, we have to let the cold run its course and rely on the fact that all the great antibodies he's getting from my breastmilk will take care of things on their own.
And I learned two things when I went to the doc this morning.
First, (drumroll and fanfare, please...) at six weeks post-partum, I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight!! Yay!! My midsection doesn't quite look the same as it did last September -- I don't know that my navel piercing will ever look like it did, I still have a stripe down my belly and things just look a little "softer" now -- but in today's group I learned some neat tummy excercises using baby as added resistance!
And secondly (and the reason I went to the doc), the pain I thought was in my right hip or lower back since somewhere in the third trimester of pregnancy was diagnosed as sacroiliac joint inflammation or injury. Apparently the pelvis has some joints in it, and the natural joint expansion of pregnancy irritated one of them for me. Continually lifting Cayden and twisting and bending with him has aggravated the joint, causing the resurgence of pain.
My body is still in the process of physically and hormonally returning to its pre-pregnancy ways, so the condition will likely fix itself in a matter of weeks or months. However, the pain got pretty bad earlier this week, and it will likely only get worse considering I can't really avoid lifting Cayden and this boy is still gaining about 2 ounces a day. So Dr. Saacks reccommended physical therapy and ultrasound treatment for me in lieu of the drugs I can't take while breastfeeding. Waiting for a call from the referral scheduler.
And thanks for all the good wishes and words of encouragement earlier this week. Mimi took Chicken Wing for much of yesterday to let me get some sleep and get caught up, and today has been a good day, so far. Just another one of those ups and downs that I keep hearing will continue for at least another month or so. I'm OK (even chipper and positive!) most of the time, but exhaustion and hormones have pushed me to the limit two or three times so far. Early Wednesday morning was one of them.
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