Jumpman

Grierson, a big fan of all things Michael Jordan, got Chicken Wing this outfit. Who knows, maybe his 22 inch length at birth will translate into a very tall boy and basketball prowess.

And another pic of two of the boys together.

Four hour stretches between feedings, then another bad day

Last night Cayden went four hours between feedings two separate times -- a first for the four-and-a-half-week old.

But today he's been inconsolable most of the day, again. Ugh. We're pretty sure it's gas pains, and we're trying all the holds, gripes, bounces and positions we can.

Wearing makeup for the first time this week

Wait, have I worn makeup since my birthday? I don't think so, now that I consider it. Yikes.

One month picture-palooza

Cayden is one month old today!! I can't believe how much he's grown, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking for the next couple of weeks to pass as quickly as possible. I'd love for him to start being able to self-soothe, and I can't WAIT to get off the friggin couch.

However, I'm not so excited to realize my maternity leave is one-third over. I sure do love this kid, but I'd really love for him to become a little more enjoyable in the next two months. :)

But today has been a really good day. So some one month pictures...

First, today's bathtime. He really likes it when I pour the water over his face; he sticks his tongue out to feel the water. Seriously, is the kid below the same as this one, at 10 days old?













Had to get at least one picture in the pre-fold diapers, before he completely outgrows them.












Handsome, snoozing in the adorable outfit Brad and Katie got him and the sporty "Pumas" from Steph.









And some brother love. Spike figured he likes the changing station part of the pack'n'play better, so now they can share the bed.

You know it's bad when Dad loses his cool

Last night Cayden gave Brian a real test. He Just. Wouldn't. Stop. Crying. I'm talking wailing and screaming, for a few hours. I took him for a walk, but he started crying as soon as we got home. I bounced him, but he started crying as soon as I stopped. Brian fed him, but he started crying as soon as he finished the bottle.

Dad started to lose his cool (he mentioned something about giving the baby back), and it was the first time he'd been pushed that far by Chicken Wing. Dad lasted until four weeks and two days before he flipped.

I tried my best to support Brian and tell him what a good job he was doing, just like he's done countless times for me.

Eventually, Cayden fell asleep from utter exhaustion. We think he got overly excited when he and I were stuck in traffic mid-afternoon and just couldn't calm down until about 8 p.m. But then he slept for two consecutive stints of three hours each.

Motivation: a smile?

While the one book I have says babies can't smile until about two months of age, another says some may smile around one month old. In the past week Brian and I have both seen what we think may be smiles. Not gas-smiles-while-he-sleeps, but actual upturned lips during the few moments he's awake and content. I tried to catch one this afternoon.

So we're calling them smiles, even if they're not yet, because this made the tough parts kinda worth it.

This week's weight gain

Monday, at three weeks and six days old, Cayden weighed 11 pounds, 6 ounces.

Tuesday, at four weeks old, he weighed 11 pounds, 10 ounces.

And today, at four weeks and two days old, he weighed 11 pounds, 15 ounces, or one ounce short of 12 pounds.

Total gain: 9 ounces in four days.

A few disjointed thoughts:

(1) I never thought ounces were so heavy until they started piling up on this baby. Chicken Wing is really heavy. I didn't expect him to get this heavy this fast. Like it hurts my back to sway and bounce him longer than five minutes or so.

(2) I thought we'd be using prefold diapers for a lot longer than two weeks, but since his circumcision didn't heal until two weeks in and the newborn prefolds are getting small already, Cayden sported his first all-in-one this afternoon. Sure, just as Dad gets good at folding, fastening and covering the prefolds, we move to the easy diapers. Well, I guess we'll use both kinds to ease up on the laundry burden until his poops and pees slow down a bit. We're still going through 12+ diapers a day.

(3) Another mom in Tuesday's BF group said her son had a constant growth spurt from three to six weeks. Seems six to eight weeks is some kind of magic timeframe when babies become much more rewarding. Two weeks to go. We can make it.

(4) Lactation Consultant and infant guru Mary says the frequent feedings, gas pains, cries and everything else we're experiencing is completely normal. She calls three to six weeks of age "all systems go," when babies turn into fussy, gassy, challenging little buggers.

(5) While it's a great opportunity to ask questions and hear from "experts" who have been through this all before, there is a down side to attending these twice-weekly mom groups at Hershey: the shopping that happens afterward. Tuesday evening I bought a sling online, after a few moms modeled them and Mary explained why they're so much more appealing to a young infant than our Bjorn, which worked for Cayden once, but not a single time since then. (at his age the "dangling" arms and legs scare him; he'd rather be bundled up) But the Bjorn is supposed to be great for older babies, so we'll return to it some day. Today we invested in an excercise ball, after watching what amazing tools they are at this morning's group. Cayden was fussing, but as soon as I sat on the ball and bounced, he went right out. The ball was only $6 at Walmart, although it's 65 cm circumference is now adding to the baby crap that has taken over what suddenly seems to be a very cramped living room.

(6) And apparently I must have "rich" or fatty milk, and that's what's helping him grow so fast. I don't know if he'll be 16.5 pounds in two weeks or not, but Mary said some babies do double their birth weight by six weeks.

This sucks

Another rough afternoon/evening. I feel like I should be so much better at this than I am. I just can't figure out Cayden's cries and cues, and eventually his crying leads to my crying, and neither of us can stop. Dad is a wonderful support, but I feel like we depend on him too much to come in and save the day; to calm Cayden and to give me a break.

But at this morning's BF group, one of the women broke down during group and a couple other commented about how many of their own tears have been shed over breastfeeding challenges and trying to figure out a newborn.

But knowing I'm not alone isn't much consolation when I can't settle him down or catch up on rest.

brief update on Mama

First of all, I started feeling "letdown" a little over a week ago, somewhere in Cayden's second to third week. Wow, that's weird. Kind of tingly, mildly painful.

Brian made me go to the doc this afternoon to get my numb-and-sometimes-painful elbow checked out, and I learned two things.

First, I'm the same weight I was when I left the hospital. Sigh. Apparently getting rid of the last five pounds is going to take some actual effort.

And secondly, it looks like some kind of nerve damage is making my elbow feel funny. Has been for about two weeks, but I can't remember doing anything to injure it. It doesn't bother me too, too much, which is a good thing, since I can't take the prescription Dr. Saacks was considering for me while breasfeeding. So I'll wait it out, and hopefully the elbow will fix itself in time.

Other than that, just tired. Always intend to nap when Cayden does, and then the day's chores catch up to me and I end up taking advantage of the time he's quiet to get things done. I just hate the feeling of not accomplishing anything in a day.

Healthy, just heavy

Dr. Baker confirmed this morning that Cayden is quite healthy, just growing faster than the average baby. This morning, at three weeks and six days old, he weighed 11 lbs., 6 oz., which is 13 ounces more than he weighed six days ago. So while his growth isn't quite as fast as what it was between weeks two and three, he's still gaining more than 2 oz. per day.

Turns out, however, babies can get too heavy too fast, and that's why he called us in for the appointment. But the problem becomes when babies retain fluid and that's the cause of the weight gain. Not the situation for us; Cayden is gaining fat, bone and muscle.

Dr. Baker said to keep doing what we're doing. Chicken Wing's appetite the past couple of days hasn't been quite as challenging as it was those few days last week, so hopefully we're on the downswing of this growth spurt.

And he slept for three hours yesterday afternoon and another three hours last night -- the first time he's done that in over a week.

Oh, and the tiny red rash Cayden developed in the last three days on the insides of his little butt cheeks are caused by constant contact with moisture, says the doc. He checked out our natural diaper rash cream (OK by him, as long as Cayden's boobies don't start growing more, which has been very rarely reported as a side effect of tea tree oil) and said to "air him out" as much as possible during the day, to help clear up the redness.

Newborn photos

I uploaded some of our favorites to Cayden's Corner today. Check them out.

First restaurant experience

Cayden lunched with my mom and dad and me at The Colonial Lounge today at three weeks and two days old. Not too fussy, but he wanted to be held and jiggled instead of sit in his car seat, and he started crying when he got hungry.

Even though I fed him at church right before we went to the Lounge, he wanted to eat again just as my salad came. So he and my parents ate together, then I ate shortly afterward. :) Yeah, more on his appetite just below, here.

Oh, and this is what I woke up to yesterday morning, after Brian took Cayden for a few hours to let me sleep after a rough night.

Hmmm, that's not Cayden in his Snuggle Nest.

Oh, there they are!

Pictures of pictures

Because the frames we got as gifts just make the photos that much more perfect.

This is the frame Renee Young (I always knew her as Ms. Borie when she was my Jr. High newspaper advisor and English teacher friend of my mom) had made for us. LOVE IT.

And this is the frame (three 8x10s) Lauren and Jeff got me for my b-day. PERFECT.

And those are a few more of the newborn photos. Birth announcements should be hitting mailboxes tomorrow, so I'll put the rest of the pro pics on Cayden's Corner on Saturday.

Pediatrician wants to see the Porker

Cayden is still eating every 1.5 to 2 hours (he'd eat every 1/2 hour if my nipples could take it, but they decidedly CAN NOT), so I decided to call the doc's office today to let them know of his voracious appetite and his dramatic weight gain. This is the fourth straight day of this kind of eating. I know the first big growth spurt comes around 2 to 3 weeks of age, but this is out of control.

Examples: Last night he breastfed around 11, then finished off a 5 oz. bottle at midnight (he's supposed to be taking 1 to 3 oz. per feeding at this point) and was up before 2 a.m., looking for the tut. This afternoon he breastfed at 4, had 2.5 ounces from a bottle at 4:45 and was back on the boob at 5:30. I don't know what to do with this kid, and the lactation consultant's advice to feed him whenever he shows signs of hunger just aren't working for me. I can't feed this kid 16 to 20 times a day. I mean I physically can't. I'm tired and emotional, and my nipples are starting to really hurt from the constant sucking and pumping to keep up with Cayden.

The nurse who called me back said Dr. Baker is confident there is nothing to worry about, but he wants to see him next Monday to check him out, nonetheless. So the porker goes back to the pediatrician at 10 a.m. Monday.

This is his face -- complete with double chin and really chubby cheeks -- after Dad was making raspberries on his tummy last night.

Newborn photos sneak peek

I'll post more after the birth announcements go out in the next day or so, but here's one of my favorites.

Ohmigosh, I hope this pace doesn't keep up

Cayden and I went to Hershey's new moms' breastfeeding class/support group this morning. One of the highlights of this weekly get-together is a weekly weigh in, to see how all the babies are doing.

So I weighed Chicken Wing. And he tipped the scale at 10 lbs., 9 oz. Since his last doctor's appointment was August 8 and he was 8 lbs., 13 oz., that means this porker gained damn near 2 lbs. in 10 days. They're supposed to gain an average of about 1 oz. per day; he's gained 2.8 oz. per day.

Holy. Crap.

Another first: mustard squirts on Mama

Very early on his 22nd day of life (1:50 a.m.), Cayden projectile pooped on my hand, as I changed his wet diaper.

Brian, I love you.

Today is the first day of my thirties, and my darling husband made for a really good birthday weekend.

He took me to a wonderful just-the-two-of-us dinner Friday (Grandma Barb & Grandpa Bill were 17-day-old Cayden's first babysitters), and he coordinated a birthday-slash-meet-Cayden party last night for about 30 people at our house.

He slept with and bottle-fed Cayden Friday and Saturday nights so I could enjoy some adult beverages and two nearly full nights of sleep.

Boy oh boy do I love that husband of mine. Because he's so caring and supportive, especially when I need it most. Because he's so much better at burping Cayden than I am. Because he can always put a smile on my face. Because he worked so hard to make my birthday special. Because he still thinks I'm sexy, even after labor & delivery, and tells me so. Because he's the best darned smelling guy I've ever come across. Because he can't stand to see me unhappy or worried and does his best to prevent and remedy sad and worrisome situations. Because he has picked up the baby books as many times as I have to try to decode Chicken Wing signals.

I love him more and more every day, and I am so thankful to be blessed with the best partner and friend I could ask for.

Goodbye umbilical cord!

The stump fell off this afternoon, during a diaper change.

Thank goodness, so now we can try a real bath instead of the sponge baths he hates so much.

Cayden is 17 days old

Cayden's first trip to the office

Thanks, Aunt Jess, for the oh-so-appropriate office attire. :) That's a navy blue tie on that onesie.

Cayden is 2 weeks and 3 days old.

No candy makes for an Angel Baby?

After Monday night back on the couch with Chicken Wing because of his gas pains, last night he slept like an angel baby, swaddled in his sleep positioner. Two long stretches of three hours, and he only took a 15 minutes after his 3 a.m. diaper change and feeding to fall back asleep.

The only things different in my diet yesterday, as compared to the prior few days, are that I didn't have any of the following:

Cucumber
Grapefruit Juice
Edamame (soy beans)
Sour Patch Kids

I'm thinking maybe the citrus and acid from the juice and candy set him off. Which is a shame, because while I could take it or leave it with regard to grapefruit juice, I'm a big fan of the gummy candies and OJ.

So maybe I wasted nearly $50 on the fancy gripe waters, or maybe last night was just one good night in what could prove to be a roller coaster of ups and downs.

Cayden is two weeks and one day old.

Introducing the bottle

Tonight, at 14 days old, Cayden had his first bottle of breastmilk while Mama napped. Dad says he gulped all three ounces down in six minutes, including burp sessions. Doc says he should only take 1-3 oz. per feeding, but Dad says he easily could have taken four or more ounces.

And Dad says Chicken Wing didn't swallow nearly as much air as he does when he breastfeeds. Hopefully the Avent bottles will work well for us. Routine will become breastfeeding all day long, and a bottle or two at night, so Dad can feed him. And probably a few more bottles this weekend, as Mama celebrates her birthday weekend.

The gas pains didn't seem quite as bad today, but we did pick up some gripe water from Target and order a couple of bottles of natural, homeopathic tummy remedy ColicCalm online. We'll see if either of these help his gas issues.

Tomorrow we may run to Borders to check out a couple of breastfeeding books and a book or two recommended by friends.

Here's a pic of Chicken Wing sleeping today.

Making the switch

Now that Cayden's circumcision has healed, we made the switch to cloth diapers this morning. Cayden is 13 days old.

And on a completely unrelated note, Chicken Wing has hair on the outside of his ears! I first noticed it a few days ago. His little hairy ears look like elf ears.

Oh, and the Snuggle Nest isn't a cure-all. Cayden's last few nights have been a little rough, as it seems Chicken Wing gets some pretty serious gas pains that wake him up every couple of hours. But we're learning tricks to help him squeeze out the toots and poops, and the books say this is a common problem that works itself out in the first couple of months as a baby's digestive system gets used to working.

Cayden's first five minutes of Tummy Time

At 12 days old, to help strengthen his neck and shoulder muscles. Tummy Time will become a daily ritual, and as he gets older he'll spend more time on his tummy.


And one of the two little guys checking each other out, because I think it's cute.

Chicken Wing certainly is growing!

Cayden gained nine ounces in one week!! He weighed in at 8 lbs., 13 oz. at yesterday's pediatrician appointment, where we met Dr. Baker.

I guess breastfeeding is working out well for the little guy. Brian says he can tell Cayden is plumping up in the face.

Dr. Baker says Chicken Wing looks and sounds great, except for two minor issues. He has a slight infection in his left eye -- I noticed the yellow crusties and goo for a couple of days -- and while his circumcision was healing very well, it was healing a bit "high." So we got a prescription ointment for the eye infection (common in the first weeks after delivery), and Dr. Baker tweaked the weenie a little bit to reopen the scab and encourage it to heal "lower." Cayden doesn't mind the eye ointment, but he sure disliked the weenie tweaking. His lungs got a good workout yesterday afternoon.

And Dr. Baker and I briefly reviewed my proposed alternate vaccination schedule, he offered me a couple more resources on vaccine news and info and we agreed to discuss in further detail at our next appointment, at two months old and at the end of September. That's when Cayden will get his first shots, and Dr. Baker (who I keep calling "the vet" for some reason) agreed to review my schedule in further detail and provide his own comments then. Doc is a traditionalist who openly "trusts the experts" and advocates the traditional vaccination schedule put forth by the CDC/AAP. However, his primary goal is getting children vaccinated, so he is willing to review and adopt a parent's alternate vaccination schedule, so long as it achieves the same goal.

Oh, and here are some pics that illustrate how and why Cayden got his nickname. Look at him showing off the chicken wings!! (Dad calls them pipes)

Back when I knew it all

Back around the end of the second trimester, beginning of the third, I was reading tons of things about baby development, and I made decisions about the way we'd raise our son. You know, things like no co-sleeping (it's a bad habit to get into and an even harder one to break), no nuks or binkies until after at least a week (they can impede breastfeeding success and become a crutch if they're not taken away soon enough) and no sleep positioners (why waste money on something completely unneccessary?).

Then Cayden was born, and it became abundantly clear that caring for a baby living on the outside is much different than planning for a baby on the outside.

Shortly after he was born we went into survival mode, or as many new moms call it -- do whatever you can to get through the days and nights.

Cayden got a blessed nuk his second night in the hospital (thanks Jeanne, for the Wubbanub suggestion -- we have yet to lose the frog, but the Soothie has been lost multiple times), we started co-sleeping on the couch when the crib proved to be a royal FAIL after two nights at home and thanks to two angels I know as Merritt and Kristen, we are now proud owners of a sleep positioner.

Dr. Baker strongly encouraged me to give up the couch routine because of the small but real risk of injury or death to Chicken Wing, should Cayden get rolled on by me or should he roll off the couch onto the floor.

Months ago Kristen recommended the Snuggle Nest to me. But that was back when I knew it all and was confident we wouldn't need the gimmick that was the perfect example of the kind of useless crap the baby industry pushes on unsuspecting new parents.

And then just a few days ago I got an unbelievably kind and heartfelt message of encouragement from Merritt, a good friend and sorority sister from college I hadn't heard from (or run into at the Phyrst) in years. We struck up a Facebook conversation, and Merritt was generous enough to share one of her tips for transitioning her now six-month old, Charlotte, into the crib: a sleep positioner.

Fast forward to us scooping one up at BRU yesterday afternoon.

That was the best damn $50 I've spent in a long time. Cayden slept in three and four hour stretches last night, swaddled and positioned snug as a bug in his pack'n'play!! I'll stay on the couch for a while until this thing proves to be successful beyond the first night, but I now have hope of someday returning to bed with my husband!
And yes, that's my Blackberry in the corner of the pack'n'play. Not only is it a useful tool for staying up-to-date on news at work, but it also turns out to be the perfect nightlight for writing down times of middle-of-the-night feedings and diaper changes.

Cayden moved off the couch at 10 days old.

Beautiful Baby Gifts

Just wanted to show some of the thoughtful, beautiful baby gifts we've received in the past week.

First, the onesies Aunt Jess made for Cayden on his first day of life. She's becoming quite the seamstress!












Here, a layette bouquet from Patti and Lucky. Those are little bibs, socks, onesies, etc. rolled up into roses. How creative!!


The very handsome personalized gifts Shawn, Molly and Aiden sent. I'll have to keep Restoration Hardware in mind for future baby gifts!









And the gorgeous diaper cake Colleen made. I've never seen one this pretty

Introducing Cayden's Corner

Check out the photo link at the top of the right-hand column -- this is where anyone and everyone can access photos of our little Chicken Wing as he grows!

A long overdue thank you

I've thanked her in person, but I wanted to thank Aunt Nicole here, as well, for updating the blog with pictures and videos while Brian, Cayden and me were in the hospital. Thank you, Nicole, for keeping everyone in the loop here and by text message and voicemail. And extra-special thanks for taking so many pictures!!

Double Digits

Cayden is 10 days old, officially in double-digits. Not giving Mama much rest at night (feeding every two to three hours, then fussing a bit afterwards), but we try to catch up with mid-morning and evening naps. And we're still on the couch, at least for now.

I'm going to try to catch it on video somehow, but this kid has some impressive power behind his poops and toots. No one who has heard them can believe such loud, powerful noises come from such a small, innocent looking baby. He actually scared me the other night, when he let one rip.

Funny thing happened yesterday when I put all my maternity clothes away in the spare closet: I got upset. Turns out I kinda miss being pregnant, and stowing all my elastic-waist pants and room-to-grow shirts in the back of the closet made me realize how quickly nine months went and what a great experience it was for me. I'm very glad to have an outside baby now, but I can't help but feel just a little less "special" without a basketball protruding from my front . Hopefully I'll have one more chance to be special and wear all those clothes again, assuming they're still stylish in a few years.

And yesterday's reflection reminded me how glad I am to have kept this journal along the way, because I can always go back and relive the excitement, the little annoyances and the new discoveries we made along the way. After all, you're only pregnant with your first child one time, and I'm so happy to have preserved a lot of those experiences.

Chicken Wing's first trip to the liquor store

Well, the supermarket, Burlington and the liquor store, to be more precise. Hey, a lot of friends are coming to meet him over the next three days, and all Dad stocked over the last eight-plus months is his own Canadian whiskey. So we replenished the bar basics while Dad worked.

But Cayden did great. Did half the trip in the Baby Bjorn, then put him back in the car seat for the supermarket run. He slept the whole time. Fed him as soon as we got home, and then he watched me prep an appetizer and dinner for Dad's return home.

Oh, and I started pumping today. Already one 4 oz. bag of milk in the freezer! Took two feedings to get 4 oz. (baby on one side; pump on the other), but the Ameda works well.

Cayden is eight days old.

One week post-partum

Not quite bikini-ready (as if I could find one to fit the boobs), but not too far to go. Although my belly button has returned to an innie, it now kind of looks like a crater.

We may just be starting to get the hang of this

A small victory, but for the first time I just showered alone in the house with Cayden, while Dad was at the gym. And Chicken Wing was still alive and thriving in his bouncy rocker when I got out!

We've kept him alive for a week, and I think we may just get the hang of this, after all.

Cayden is seven days old.

One more video: leaving the hospital

...because Brian may well turn out to be one of those annoying parents who wants to capture everything on camera. But I thought this one from Thursday was cute...

A morning of firsts

7:15 a.m: first diaper change pee spray on Mama

9:55 a.m.: first diaper change pee spray on Dad

11:15: first hour of fresh air in the big wide world, as Mama walked the neighborhood with Chicken Wing in the stroller.

The past two or three days have been much better than our first couple of days home from the hospital. We're all sleeping in decent windows of at least two to three hours, now, and yesterday Cayden started feeding pretty regularly in three hour increments. Things are definitely looking up! As evidenced by my daily to-do lists. I never thought I'd have to put something as simple as "trim fingernails" (mine) on a list, but Friday and Saturday were so overwhelming I never thought I'd remember or get to that simple task.

Newborn photo session with Jeff and Jodie went very well last night, as Cayden was the near-perfect prop -- err, model -- for two hours. Can't wait to see the results!! And so glad we did them early, because Dad thinks Cayden's looks are starting to change already: his hair is a little different and his face may be filling out.

Hoping to set up a photo sharing account today so anyone who has photographed Chicken Wing can upload the pics for everyone to see and so Mama and Dad have access to all of them.

Cayden is six days old.

Dad's first poopie diaper

He's gotten much better in the last few days. A good thing, since each feeding is now accompanied by a mustard poop.

A few random thoughts and updates

Because that's how my brain is working, now. Seems I got the foggy pregnancy brain after pregnancy had ended.

1.) Delivery was the fastest 14 pounds I've ever dropped. They weighed me just before we left the hospital, and all but 6 pounds disappeared almost immediately. Belly looks goofy and deflated now, as the uterus continues to shrink. But the linea nigra is still as nigra as ever.

2.) For all the worrying I've been doing over a lack of wet & soiled diapers, the pediatrician says Cayden is doing great. In fact, he had gained a little weight back (after the initial loss all babies experience) by yesterday's pediatrician's visit. Next doc's visit is next Friday. Oh, and the red patch on his right eye is a "stork bite" -- a kind of birthmark that fades a few days or weeks after birth. Most babies get them at the base of the head; Cayden got one on his eye.

3.) I've dubbed him Chicken Wing, because his arms look and move like chicken wings. And dad says his legs are skinny chicken legs. Hmmm, I remember teasing a certain new dad about his own chicken legs during our dating days.

4.) Brian thinks Cayden looks just like me in my infant pictures. I think he got dad's eyes.

5.) Newborn photos are scheduled for Monday evening!!! We're so excited to see Jodie and Jeff Wolf, and to capture Chicken Wing in his earliest days.

6.) This is HARD. I knew it would be, but everything people tells you just doesn't mean anything until it's happening to you. I'm constantly tired, my emotions and hormones are starting to get the best of me, I can't seem to find the right time/moment to pay attention to the cats and for being so busy all day, and I sure have little to show for it at the end of each day. Sorry to the friends I have yet to call back, and sorry to the family who has yet to see Cayden. It's all I can do to get through the mostly sleepless nights without breaking down. I wish I was a better napper. I just can't seem to fall asleep during the day, which makes the nights even harder. It's a lot of pressure being the little guy's chuck wagon and only source of food, but we're making it work. It will be nice, however, when I can start pumping and dad can take care of a feeding or two. You know, since we're doing about 10 a day at this point. I have no idea how single moms or moms of twins do this. But I just keep repeating to myself: "this, too, shall pass"; eventually, things will get a little easier. And the new dad is really good about delivering hugs and words of encouragement at just the right times.

7.) So you can understand, I hope, if I'm not as regular as I'd like to be in providing updates here. Hopefully I can post more as things calm down a bit, but I now understand first-hand how everything else is just left on the ever-growing to-do list when there's a newborn in the picture.

Here are the two of us, early this morning. Hoping I'm not setting myself up for harder times down the road, but falling asleep with him last night was the only way I had a prayer of making it until morning.

Cayden is five days old.